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There was a zebra who had always wondered:
Was he a black horse with white stripes,
or a white horse with black stripes?
This little zebra traversed the world, looking for a wise man who would give him the answer. Eventually he came to Timbuktu, where everyone told him he would find the answer.
He was directed to the famous wise man, who knew the answer to everything.
With his heart in his mouth, he asked the question:
"O Wise man, am i a black horse with white stripes,
or a white horse with black stripes?"
The wise man replied slowly, his eyes closed.
"You are what you are." Then he said no more.
The zebra was ushered out before he could ask more. Now suitably flummoxed, he asked the assistant why he did not receive an answer, since the wise man knew everything.
The assistant insisted the answer had been given.
The zebra asked: "So am I a black horse with white stripes,
or a white horse with black stripes?"
"That's simple," the assistant replied. "You're a white horse with black stripes."
"How do you know?" the zebra inquired.
"Well, if you were a black horse with white stripes, he would've said, 'You is what you is.' "
Thursday, September 16, 2004
Jazz Concert
OK to get four free tickets to a jazz concert by SAF Central Band and featuring four local jazz musicians. It's on 23 Sep at 730pm, Singapore Conference Hall (near Shenton Way). All you have to do is call 64505895 and leave your name. Enjoy!
Tuesday, September 14, 2004
Wild Wild Wet
Oh and I can buy Wild Wild Wet tix at half price for $6.50. So let me know if you want any. Exclusive to my faithful readers.
GV movie tickets
I am able to buy 10 GV movie passes for $5.50 each, any time any day. interested. Of course I want some for myself, but anyone wants any? Let me know asap. Exclusively for readers of this blog.
Unnmoveable vs Irresistable
A US Navy ship is travelling in Iraqi waters when they receive this radio message: Please alter your course 15 degrees east to avoid a collision. The ship navigator concurs and advises the ship captain that one of them needs to change course.
The ship captain replies: I am Captain Roger of the USS Dell and I suggest YOU change your course.
The reply is prompt and incenses the captain: I'm going to insist that YOU change your course instead.
The captain replies: I am the Commander of aircraft carrier USS Dell, with enough firepower to blow you out of the water, and we will take action if we perceive and lack of cooperation or aggression toward us. We are not diverting from our charted course!!! Why on earth should we move?!?!
The reply was short: We are a lighthouse.
The ship captain replies: I am Captain Roger of the USS Dell and I suggest YOU change your course.
The reply is prompt and incenses the captain: I'm going to insist that YOU change your course instead.
The captain replies: I am the Commander of aircraft carrier USS Dell, with enough firepower to blow you out of the water, and we will take action if we perceive and lack of cooperation or aggression toward us. We are not diverting from our charted course!!! Why on earth should we move?!?!
The reply was short: We are a lighthouse.
The immoral doctor
Tim had felt guilty all day long. No matter how hard he tried to forget it, he just could not. The shame was overwhelming.
But he would hear a voice tell him: "Don't worry, you aren't the first doctor to sleep with your patient, and you certainly won;t be the last. And you're single, so just let it go."
But invariably the other voice would bring him back to reality: "Tim, you're a veterinarian..."
But he would hear a voice tell him: "Don't worry, you aren't the first doctor to sleep with your patient, and you certainly won;t be the last. And you're single, so just let it go."
But invariably the other voice would bring him back to reality: "Tim, you're a veterinarian..."
Beer Drinkers' Survey
Topic: Beer Drinkers' Survey
Date: 6 - 17 Sep 2004 (closing date is Wed, 15 Sep)
Time: 1100 - 2130 hrs (any time suitable for the interviewee)
Interview length: 30 min
Venue: Field Dept, 4th floor, 241 River Valley Rd (at the junction of River Valley Rd and Jln Mohd Sultan)
Pre-requisites: Interviewees must be MALE and 18 - 59 years old
Incentive: Successful interviewees will be paid in cash on-the-spot, on conclusion of the interview, as follows: 18 - 29 years old: S$30; 30 - 59 years old: S$40
Exceptions: All interviewees and their family members / close friends must NOT be working in industries such as market research, advertising, PR, or manufacturer / retailer of alcoholic beverages
If you or your friends wish to be considered for this survey, kindly contact Aaron at 94566789 or through email at aaronwong@journalist.com as soon as possible, with your name, age and contact number.
ACORN Marketing and Research Consultants, the company conducting the interviews, will then contact potential interviewees individually by phone to assess their suitability. ACORN will then arrange for an interview with you directly. Please be assured that ACORN will only use your contact number for the purposes of arranging an appointment for this survey ONLY. Your information will be kept confidential.
I hope to hear from you soon. This, in my humble opinion, is a really simple way to pick up some extra spending money. If you don't qualify for this particular survey, be rest assured that there will me many more in future that I will update you with. Alternatively, if you don't to hear from me about these surveys, just let me know. Thanks.
Yours sincerely, Aaron
Date: 6 - 17 Sep 2004 (closing date is Wed, 15 Sep)
Time: 1100 - 2130 hrs (any time suitable for the interviewee)
Interview length: 30 min
Venue: Field Dept, 4th floor, 241 River Valley Rd (at the junction of River Valley Rd and Jln Mohd Sultan)
Pre-requisites: Interviewees must be MALE and 18 - 59 years old
Incentive: Successful interviewees will be paid in cash on-the-spot, on conclusion of the interview, as follows: 18 - 29 years old: S$30; 30 - 59 years old: S$40
Exceptions: All interviewees and their family members / close friends must NOT be working in industries such as market research, advertising, PR, or manufacturer / retailer of alcoholic beverages
If you or your friends wish to be considered for this survey, kindly contact Aaron at 94566789 or through email at aaronwong@journalist.com as soon as possible, with your name, age and contact number.
ACORN Marketing and Research Consultants, the company conducting the interviews, will then contact potential interviewees individually by phone to assess their suitability. ACORN will then arrange for an interview with you directly. Please be assured that ACORN will only use your contact number for the purposes of arranging an appointment for this survey ONLY. Your information will be kept confidential.
I hope to hear from you soon. This, in my humble opinion, is a really simple way to pick up some extra spending money. If you don't qualify for this particular survey, be rest assured that there will me many more in future that I will update you with. Alternatively, if you don't to hear from me about these surveys, just let me know. Thanks.
Yours sincerely, Aaron
Monday, September 13, 2004
Mission Trip
OK the reason why I haven't been blogging for a week is because I was in Thailand on a mission trip. Nothing to do with the SAF, though we did fly near Kanchanaburi, but rather on an evangelistic mission with 10 others from my church. Five of us were first-timers, but it didn't matter as we all gelled wonderfully and enjoyed oourselves tremendously.
I probably wasn't in the best of condition for the trip, and had a constant cough and slight fever throughout the trip. This and the inherent eczema exacerbated by the daily exposure to the elements. But all this is unimportant.
What was important was how God opened my eyes to His ministry and the wonderful thing He is doing in Khon Kaen and Mahasarakam, towns in Northeast Thailand, one of the most impoverished provinces.
It was so wonderful to see the joy on the children's faces as we visited schools from primary level all the way to university level.
Seeing the primary children with their torn shoes and socks, threadbare uniforms, but still clenching their hands and closing their eyes so tight when we prayed, it broke my heart. But seeing their faces light up with joy when we sang and danced together, it just made all the sweat and fatigue worth it. And they were just so happy with little gifts that we gave, which back home in Singapore our kids wouldn't give a second glance. But here they grasped these as if they were the only things they had.
I put my cap on a little girl's head (let's call her Boo) and she wore it as if she believed she was queen for a day, never letting it go. Due to our policy on personal gifts though, it had to be returned, but I did manage to leave my whistle with her. I'd like to think she's driving her family crazy with it. I'll post a picture soon.
The high school (or what we'd call secondary) students were certainly a rowdy bunch. While at primary level the boys were noisier than the girls, when they grew up it reversed. The boys were all in Boy Scout uniforms, and the girls in Girl Guides' and Girl Scouts'. How they cheered and called for more after our songs and skit! And how eagerly they pressed forward for autographs from us afterward! If we can direct this desire into a longing to know more about God, Thailand will know revival!
Though, it was the Bachelor in English Language students that connected with me. These are young men and women my age who have never set foot outside Thailand, but yet harbour such wonderful ambitions to be tour guides, news reporters, boxers. They show such a willingness to learn about our Singaporean culture, but yet their humility and bashfulness keeps them from asking more. Three of the four male students I spoke too have actually heard the gospel, and two of them had attended church before. Indeed the gospel of Jesus Christ has begun to permeate the youth of Thailand, and we will see them use their energy and vitality to reach their countrymen. A second year student, Off, actually attended one of our children's outreach ministries a night later. I trust God ministered to him, and I'm thankful that we were able to speak to him before he went home that night.
The youth in Mahasarakam under Ajaan Dat were an inspiration to us because they were just SO talented in dance, compared to the ponderous Singaporeans, and they did it with such joy, as if they meant every word, even though it was in English, their weaker language. We were blessed by them, and it was a blessing to be able to have been used by God to answer their prayer for yellow t-shirts.
It was also a blessing to see Air's ministry slowly but surely come to fruition. She now has some land, and she is planning an orphanage, training school and English centre. May God bless her and James richly.
Personally I've been blessed tremendously by the love of our Thai brethren and can't wait to go back. I'm told I have to skip March as it is too hot, but let's see if God heals me eh? I have 16 days leave next year, so it'll be just nice.
The food there is FANTASTIC! May be on the spicy side, but their papaya salad, tomyam, pork, chicken was heavenly. And with all the fresh fruits, it was even healthier than what we eat back here. We were even blessed with a home-cooked dinner by our driver, who shared the same name as the noise his horn made - Phi Phu. We bought all sorts of groceries for him, that bluffed him to say it was for us to bring back to Singapore. He was wondering wy Singapore didn't have all that stuff!
You know, it'd take me forever to talk about everything, and I don't have forever, so I won't. If you wanna know more, just pick up the phone and drop me a line lor!
San-sern Pra-Jao!!!
I probably wasn't in the best of condition for the trip, and had a constant cough and slight fever throughout the trip. This and the inherent eczema exacerbated by the daily exposure to the elements. But all this is unimportant.
What was important was how God opened my eyes to His ministry and the wonderful thing He is doing in Khon Kaen and Mahasarakam, towns in Northeast Thailand, one of the most impoverished provinces.
It was so wonderful to see the joy on the children's faces as we visited schools from primary level all the way to university level.
Seeing the primary children with their torn shoes and socks, threadbare uniforms, but still clenching their hands and closing their eyes so tight when we prayed, it broke my heart. But seeing their faces light up with joy when we sang and danced together, it just made all the sweat and fatigue worth it. And they were just so happy with little gifts that we gave, which back home in Singapore our kids wouldn't give a second glance. But here they grasped these as if they were the only things they had.
I put my cap on a little girl's head (let's call her Boo) and she wore it as if she believed she was queen for a day, never letting it go. Due to our policy on personal gifts though, it had to be returned, but I did manage to leave my whistle with her. I'd like to think she's driving her family crazy with it. I'll post a picture soon.
The high school (or what we'd call secondary) students were certainly a rowdy bunch. While at primary level the boys were noisier than the girls, when they grew up it reversed. The boys were all in Boy Scout uniforms, and the girls in Girl Guides' and Girl Scouts'. How they cheered and called for more after our songs and skit! And how eagerly they pressed forward for autographs from us afterward! If we can direct this desire into a longing to know more about God, Thailand will know revival!
Though, it was the Bachelor in English Language students that connected with me. These are young men and women my age who have never set foot outside Thailand, but yet harbour such wonderful ambitions to be tour guides, news reporters, boxers. They show such a willingness to learn about our Singaporean culture, but yet their humility and bashfulness keeps them from asking more. Three of the four male students I spoke too have actually heard the gospel, and two of them had attended church before. Indeed the gospel of Jesus Christ has begun to permeate the youth of Thailand, and we will see them use their energy and vitality to reach their countrymen. A second year student, Off, actually attended one of our children's outreach ministries a night later. I trust God ministered to him, and I'm thankful that we were able to speak to him before he went home that night.
The youth in Mahasarakam under Ajaan Dat were an inspiration to us because they were just SO talented in dance, compared to the ponderous Singaporeans, and they did it with such joy, as if they meant every word, even though it was in English, their weaker language. We were blessed by them, and it was a blessing to be able to have been used by God to answer their prayer for yellow t-shirts.
It was also a blessing to see Air's ministry slowly but surely come to fruition. She now has some land, and she is planning an orphanage, training school and English centre. May God bless her and James richly.
Personally I've been blessed tremendously by the love of our Thai brethren and can't wait to go back. I'm told I have to skip March as it is too hot, but let's see if God heals me eh? I have 16 days leave next year, so it'll be just nice.
The food there is FANTASTIC! May be on the spicy side, but their papaya salad, tomyam, pork, chicken was heavenly. And with all the fresh fruits, it was even healthier than what we eat back here. We were even blessed with a home-cooked dinner by our driver, who shared the same name as the noise his horn made - Phi Phu. We bought all sorts of groceries for him, that bluffed him to say it was for us to bring back to Singapore. He was wondering wy Singapore didn't have all that stuff!
You know, it'd take me forever to talk about everything, and I don't have forever, so I won't. If you wanna know more, just pick up the phone and drop me a line lor!
San-sern Pra-Jao!!!
Thursday, September 02, 2004
Let the commercialisation commence
OK I'm a sellout. See the little unobtrusive ad on the right hand column? OK now click on it. Good. I've just earned a few cents. OK Guys. Do me a favour and click on it whenever you log in, as many times as you want. Helps augment my meagre NS pay...
Wednesday, September 01, 2004
Flatulently speaking...
When C3PO said he was affluent in over 6 billion languages, did he really mean effluent? If you're feeling rather gassy sing along to this, with appropriate sphinctural percussion:
Beans, beans, they're good for your heart
The more you eat, the more you fart
The more you fart, the better you feel
So let's have beans for every meal!
Here's to Heinz, Inc. America's singular culprit of global warming.
Beans, beans, they're good for your heart
The more you eat, the more you fart
The more you fart, the better you feel
So let's have beans for every meal!
Here's to Heinz, Inc. America's singular culprit of global warming.
5 days to go!
OK I'm trying to psyche myself up. Doesn't quite work cos all I'm looking forward to is the weekend and suddenly I have to pack all my stuff for mission trip. Anybody want anything from thailand? =] I draw the line at Tata Young CDs.
Saturday, August 28, 2004
Friday, August 27, 2004
Hana & Alice
While I'm not normally a fan of Japanese fare, Hana & Alice was a relly nice movie. It may have been all saccharine-sweet and a Yuu Aoi vehicle, but hey, I'm a sucker. =]
This movie isn't without its hilarious moments too, and is well worth watching, even during the weekend.
The script is nothing original, but this director really immerses you into the story and its characters. He even loses focus halfway through, but you don't really mind, cos everyone's so damn sweet.
This movie isn't without its hilarious moments too, and is well worth watching, even during the weekend.
The script is nothing original, but this director really immerses you into the story and its characters. He even loses focus halfway through, but you don't really mind, cos everyone's so damn sweet.
Monday, August 23, 2004
5 Day Work Week!!!
I love PM Lee! He just announced a 5-day work week for civil servants; same hours, compressed into the weekdays. Shiok ah? What's long weekend? =]
Saturday, August 21, 2004
Friday, August 20, 2004
Thursday, August 12, 2004
RAW
I scratched my nack to bloody bits again last night. I now know the meaning of intolaerable. I knew if i scratched it'd get really bad, but I really couldn't help it. Today it's open sores all over, thank God the surprisingly sympathetic MO gave me two days Attend C. I wouldn't know what to do otherwise. They do have good in them after all. So i only return to work on Momday morning.
Tuesday, August 10, 2004
The weekend
Wow let's catch up on the weekend shall we?
Saturday:
After mulling over whether to turn up at work at all, coming to work proved to be the right decision, as my boss turned up. Whew! Then played pool at Woodlands, before joining the youth for outing at Pasir Ris Park. I missed the games, but good thing I didn't miss the birthday saboing.
Sunday:
Had mission training after service till about 1930hrs, but was rather fun with all the desynchronised dancing. Then went to join friends and parents to watch fireworks at Esplanade. My friends had waited since 1630hrs with a year-old baby, sorry, toddler in tow. When I got there I couldn't find them cos:
1. There were too many people.
2. There were too many people using the mobile networks so I couldn't contact them.
So anyway I found myself a good spot on the bridge railing and at 2030hrs the fireworks lit up the night sky... for all of five minutes. Then came the mad rush to get AWAY from the Esplanade. This probably took another 15 minutes, during which time I still couldn't find my friends cos:
1. There were too many people.
2. There were too many people using the mobile networks so I couldn't contact them.
Was originally supposed to go to Edgar's house to catch the Community Shield, but decided to hop to CHIJMES instead. Free lawn to sit on, big screen, ahhh. But I had to sit beside an inebriated heckler who had had too much to drink. Hang on, he noly had a Tiger, so he must be naturally boorish then. Irritated the hell outta me with baseless comments about how Jermaine Pennant and Alan Smith used to play for Leeds. Good job Ferdinand wasn't playing then, eh? He apparently hated both Leeds and Manchester United, which just doesn't cut cheese if you know about the War of the Roses. So irritating that I left midway through the second half to go catch my last train. OK lah, by then United were 3-1 down, and the kids were kicking the ball around. No oles then.
Ran for last train to Dhoby Ghaut, then ran like hell at Dhoby Ghaut to catch last train to Sengkang, only to discover it was arriving in 8 min, with another 13 min after that. And the moronic staff at City Hall actually told me: "No train oredi." When I questioned this, he said: "You better run at Dhoby Ghaut." Waste my time.
Oh, the match. Well United have some bucking up to do, especially in defence. There was a general absence of a FLAT. BACK. FOUR. Mostly because they were in a crooked line, they weren't back in defence, and there was usually less than four of them around, including Tim Howard.
Monday:
Had dim sum at Crystal Jade at Woodlands, only for the bill for a four-person lunch to be $90!!! Was my mum treating my dad on his birthday though, so eat first think later.
Then went to Jasmine's house where we:
1. Played with Ian.
2. Played with Joey.
3. Watched Ian play with Joey.
4. Played daidee.
5. Watched NDP and Singapore Idol.
6. Played daidee while laughing at NDP and Singapore Idol.
7. Laughed some more at Lemon Tree singer.
What a weekend! And now I'm on duty. With a LWE this week, I only have THREE working days this week! And my colleague's coming back tmr!!!
Saturday:
After mulling over whether to turn up at work at all, coming to work proved to be the right decision, as my boss turned up. Whew! Then played pool at Woodlands, before joining the youth for outing at Pasir Ris Park. I missed the games, but good thing I didn't miss the birthday saboing.
Sunday:
Had mission training after service till about 1930hrs, but was rather fun with all the desynchronised dancing. Then went to join friends and parents to watch fireworks at Esplanade. My friends had waited since 1630hrs with a year-old baby, sorry, toddler in tow. When I got there I couldn't find them cos:
1. There were too many people.
2. There were too many people using the mobile networks so I couldn't contact them.
So anyway I found myself a good spot on the bridge railing and at 2030hrs the fireworks lit up the night sky... for all of five minutes. Then came the mad rush to get AWAY from the Esplanade. This probably took another 15 minutes, during which time I still couldn't find my friends cos:
1. There were too many people.
2. There were too many people using the mobile networks so I couldn't contact them.
Was originally supposed to go to Edgar's house to catch the Community Shield, but decided to hop to CHIJMES instead. Free lawn to sit on, big screen, ahhh. But I had to sit beside an inebriated heckler who had had too much to drink. Hang on, he noly had a Tiger, so he must be naturally boorish then. Irritated the hell outta me with baseless comments about how Jermaine Pennant and Alan Smith used to play for Leeds. Good job Ferdinand wasn't playing then, eh? He apparently hated both Leeds and Manchester United, which just doesn't cut cheese if you know about the War of the Roses. So irritating that I left midway through the second half to go catch my last train. OK lah, by then United were 3-1 down, and the kids were kicking the ball around. No oles then.
Ran for last train to Dhoby Ghaut, then ran like hell at Dhoby Ghaut to catch last train to Sengkang, only to discover it was arriving in 8 min, with another 13 min after that. And the moronic staff at City Hall actually told me: "No train oredi." When I questioned this, he said: "You better run at Dhoby Ghaut." Waste my time.
Oh, the match. Well United have some bucking up to do, especially in defence. There was a general absence of a FLAT. BACK. FOUR. Mostly because they were in a crooked line, they weren't back in defence, and there was usually less than four of them around, including Tim Howard.
Monday:
Had dim sum at Crystal Jade at Woodlands, only for the bill for a four-person lunch to be $90!!! Was my mum treating my dad on his birthday though, so eat first think later.
Then went to Jasmine's house where we:
1. Played with Ian.
2. Played with Joey.
3. Watched Ian play with Joey.
4. Played daidee.
5. Watched NDP and Singapore Idol.
6. Played daidee while laughing at NDP and Singapore Idol.
7. Laughed some more at Lemon Tree singer.
What a weekend! And now I'm on duty. With a LWE this week, I only have THREE working days this week! And my colleague's coming back tmr!!!
Tuesday, August 03, 2004
On the bright side...
I managed to apply leave for my mission trip, which means i'm only awaiting confirmation in b&w. thank God!
Torment
My skin is killing me, really. I went to sleep at 11, but onlt managed to sleep at 3am because I was scratching away till then till I bled. The result? Frighteningly grotesque wounds on the neck and arms. Can't take it anymore...
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