Dr. Seuss' The Cat in the Hat

Flixster Plot: Today is a special day for Conrad and Sally Walden--even though they don't think it is. It seems that Sally and Conrad, different as black and white, have pushed their single mom, Joan Walden, to the limit. Conrad's endless rule breaking has his mom seriously considering military school for her son--an idea planted by her just-this-side-of-smarmy neighbor and suitor, Lawrence Quinn. Sally, tightly wound though well-behaved, has bossed away every friend she has, and divides her time between upbraiding her brother and putting new 'To Do' lists in her junior palm pilot. And all the while their mom is just trying to keep domestic peace while balancing a successful career as a real estate agent for her germophobe boss, Mr. Humberfloob. However, on the Saturday that she is to host her company's party, Joan's preparations have fallen prey to Conrad's shenanigans. Thus, she lays down a mom-sized decree: Sally and Conrad are not to leave the house while she is at work; furthermore, they are forbidden from making a mess or misbehaving in any way. The kids are left with little to do besides sit and stare out of the window, while their babysitter, Mrs. Kwan, dozes in the den. Until their unexpected guest--a six-foot-tall talking feline, sporting a red-and-white-striped stovepipe hat--appears. The original party animal himself arrives to turn their world upside down by showing Sally and Conrad that "it's good to have fun--but you have to know how!"

My take: Lame shit. Watchable for Dakota Fanning alone.

Brain teaser

What do these words have in common?
Banana
Dresser
Grammar
Potato
Revive
Uneven
Assess

Answer: No, it is not that they all have at least 2 double letters.
In all of the words listed, if you take the first letter, place it at the
end of the word, and then spell the word backwards, it will be the same word.

De Coder's Cafe

Board game haters beware! There's a new board game cafe in Newton called De Coder's Cafe. They have an interesting pricing system so it might be worth checking out once. Check it out: http://www.decoderscafe.com/index.htm

Christian lo hei

Red envelope which contains pepper
“Praise the Lord, for peppering us with your loving kindness.”

Green envelope which contains five-spice powder
“Praise the Lord, for accepting our labor as a fragrant offering to His plan.”

Fish
“Praise the Lord, for the grace of God to be fishers of men.”

Oil
“Praise the Lord, for the oil that keeps us burning in this fight of faith.”
“Praise the Lord, for anointing us with the oil of joy.” (Psa 45:7)

Plum Sauce
“Praise the Lord, for the sweetness of your Words sweeter than honey to my mouth.” (Psa 119:103)

Crackers
“Praise the Lord, for the street of pure gold that you have prepared for us to live in eternity.” (Rev 21:21)

United 2-0 Portsmouth

How the hell do you stop this?!

NTU CAC Chinese Orchestra

Dropped by Yinglei's Chinese Orchestra performance at NTU and was pleasantly surprised at the music on show.

Well, firstly, she had to catch her hand on the door as she went to get something. Cue some silent, frantic hand-waving.

The emcees, both in English and Mandarin, were really lame. Can even put Teckseng in the shade. Their languages were all rojak and they kept mispronouncing and stumbling over words, butchering some foreign languages for good measure. Plus they had to shamelessly plug their upcoming concert: Can't blame them there. They whispered to each other but forgot that everyone could hear them.

That aside, the performances were actually really good. Enjoyed Yinglei's guitar-like duet where they did a Tchaikovsky. Her instrument (forgot what it's called) is very similar to a guitar, only with a G-D-G-D tuning. They play mostly two-note chords while harmionising with another instrument. They also play a percussive role on the more upbeat songs. Can understand why she doesn't want to learn guitar first as this would really throw her off with the guitar's E-A-D-G-B-E tuning.

The one that took the cake was the erhu solo that mimicked chirping birds and galloping horses. The guy got it right down to the whinnying of the horse. Such virtuoso technique! Would make an interesting intro if there was a lesson on animals.

The $10 concert in March sounds like an altogether more attractive proposition now. =]

United 3-1 Spurs

Goal: Luton Shelton, Assist: A. Balloon

Luton Shelton scores a farcical goal for Sheffield United to upset Manchester City in a FA Cup fourth round upset. Michael Ball was confused by a balloon's inspired flick on and Shelton was the beneficiary. Ironically, it was City fans who released the balloons.

Skoda Fabia ad

Peugeot 206 ad

Sony Bravia ad

Australian Tourism Bored

I think I want to work for the Australian Tourism Board; they sound like my kind of people! These were posted on an Australian Tourism Website and the answers are the actual responses by the website officials, who obviously have a sense of humour.
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Q: Does it ever get windy in Australia ? I have never seen it rain on TV, how do the plants grow? (UK)
A: We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around watching them die.

Q: Will I be able to see kangaroos in the street? (USA)
A: Depends how much you've been drinking.

Q: I want to walk from Perth to Sydney - can I follow the railroad tracks? (Sweden)
A: Sure, it's only three thousand miles, take lots of water.

Q: Are there any ATMs (cash machines) in Australia? Can you send me a list of them in Brisbane, Cairns, Townsville and Hervey Bay? (UK)
A: What did your last slave die of?

Q: Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Australia? (USA)
A: A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe. Aus-tra-lia is that big island in the middle of the Pacific which does not... oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Kings Cross. Come naked.

Q: Which direction is North in Australia? (USA)
A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees. Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions.

Q: Can I bring cutlery into Australia? (UK)
A: Why? Just use your fingers like we do.

Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? (USA)
A: Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is... oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Kings Cross, straight after the hippo races. Come naked.

Q: Are there supermarkets in Sydney and is milk available all year round? (Germany)
A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of vegan hunter/gatherers. Milk is illegal.

Q: Please send a list of all doctors in Australia who can dispense rattlesnake serum. (USA)
A: Rattlesnakes live in A-meri-ca which is where YOU come from. All Australian snakes are perfectly harmless, can be safely handled and make good pets.

Q: I have a question about a famous animal in Australia, but I forget its name. It's a kind of bear and lives in trees. (USA)
A: It's called a Drop Bear. They are so called because they drop out of Gum trees and eat the brains of anyone walking underneath them. You can scare them off by spraying yourself with human urine before you go out walking.

Q: I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Can you tell me where I can sell it in Australia? (USA)
A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.

Q: Can you tell me the regions in Tasmania where the female population is smaller than the male population? (Italy)
A: Yes, gay night clubs.

Q: Do you celebrate Christmas in Australia? (France)
A: Only at Christmas.

Q: I was in Australia in 1969 on R&R, and I want to contact the girl I dated while I was staying in Kings Cross. Can you help? (USA)
A: Yes, and you will still have to pay her by the hour.

Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? (USA)
A: Yes, but you'll have to learn it first.

Microteaching

Kena massacred for microteaching, but I didn't even get the worst of it. Two others got it worse, including one for speaking out of turn. At least it's over.

There really isn't much reason to come on Tue and Thu any more since we're just observing our peers. I will go see Dr Hia tomorrow afternoon before he flies to Japan. Makes sense.
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19 Jan 2008, 2259hrs
Supposedly after TA, microteaching is peanuts. Well apparently I'm a monkey with digestive problems, because the same problem of mental block and creative haemorrahage seemed to happen when I was doing my lesson plan. The ideas just don't seem to flow. Can't explain it. Well, at least the lesson plan is done and ready for Thursday.

Swimming

Do NOT swim on a Saturday evening. The pool is full of kids (who stand on the lane ropes) and teenagers (who apologise simperingly when asked to stop loitering at the lap pool), the water's full of flotsam, jetsam, snot and whatever else and the place is super crowded. Still managed to get 20 laps in though, and so did Jasmine.
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23 Jan 2008, 2121hrs
Swam for the first time in don't know how long at Hougang Swimming Complex this afternoon. Originally targetted 5 laps but realised it got easier and easier after that. So swam 20 breaststroke laps in all, averaging about 1.5min per lap. I realised I can't swim the crawl: can't coordinate the feet, arms and breathing. Should I swim again this Sat? =]

Australian Open 2008 Ladies' Final

Ah, so. The glamour tennis final all the hacks had been hoping for (along with about three billion males) ends with the Russian loudhailer completing a 7-5, 6-3 win over the Serbain ingenue. The beautiful Maria clobbered the pretty Ana into submission with a masterclass in powerful groundstrokes and passing shots. You think back to a few years ago when Maria realised that she would need to develop the power side of a game to complete with the Williamses, and now Ana must do the same to keep up with Maria. Both ladies played tennis to grace any final, before Ana faded towards the end while Maria grew from strength to strength. What was the difference? Experience? Fitness? Fatigue? Who knows? But it's all moot, as Maria claims her third Grand Slam of her career.

But Ana sure won over many new fans with her fighting spirit to save two championship points before succumbing to the inevitable. Maria's hunger won this for her.

Ergonomic pillow

Yes I've jumped on the bandwagon, an era after Sellavision's Support Pillow that cost $49.90. Saw a $45 one at Ikea Tampines so I thought, "Why not?"

Realised I didn't think through the "Why on earth did I buy it?" part but it was too late. Been enjoying blissful sleep so far. It could be psychological though.

Stuart Goes to School by Sara Pennypacker

Another interesting book that can be used to talk about fears and life in school among other things. It is the sequel to Stuart's Cape, but I haven't read that one. Has the Powerpuff Girls-type graphics that kids are used to and a fantastical storyline. Trying this out on my P2 student. Hope he doesn't say it's boring.

Esio Trot by Roald Dahl

Another lovely book by Roald Dahl. Can't think of many teaching points but useful as an introduction to weight, perhaps. An absolute delight to read. Can't believe Cedric (my P6 tuition kid) said it was boring. After all the effort I put in. Lectured him on his lack of tact. Kids these days.

2010 Youth Olympics

Firstly, I hope I got the year right.

It's down to Singapore and Moscow for the inaugural Youth Olympics after Turin, Bangkok and some other city were eliminated. While Moscow was ranked better and Singapore lost out on the later Games Village completion date, we live in hope. It'd be a shame, after all, if the money NIE spent on a mural to commemorate all that was wasted. The IOC wouldn't be very nice if they did that, would they?

Principals

Wel, well, well! The New Paper is getting more interesting! A letter in the forum about how principals need to improve on their people skills. I'm glad to have had good principals so far, but have heard enough horror stories from colleagues and friends. Firstly, let me say that they have a really difficult job on their hands, though they are paid to do so. But my point is that just as football players don't necessarily make the best managers, teachers don't necessarily nake the best principals. It's almsot a totally different set of skills. While they may be excellent educators with a genuine heart for children, they may not be the most skilled in dealing with employees and parents. If courses would help them in this blind spot, then why not? But please don't make it another superfluous and run-of-the-mill thing. That's too much of that floating around in TRAISI.

Let's face it: results are more important than staff well-being. The school will always come first. It's just dumping more work on you in a mroe civilised way.

My quirky alarm clock

Seems to be working. Hope it stays that way.
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19 Jan 08, 2243hrs
Reached a compromise. Scotch-taping my battery securely to my alarm clock. Let's see if it works.
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19 Jan 08, 1543hrs
No this is not a Maths problem.

When my alarm rings, it somehow shakes the battery loose and the clock stops running. So sometimes a snooze can be a really long time. I think I need a new clock. =[

Monopoly

Dang, it clashes with my time table. However I have the option of getting someone to stand in for me before I play the other two games. I think I'll pass. Monopoly relies too much on chance for me to stake $2 and two evenings on. Scrabble maybe. =]
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21 Jan 2008, 1124hrs
Thinking of registering for a Monopoly competition in school. Sounds like fun and I've always wanted to play for some real prizes other than counterfeit paper money and bragging rights. Costs $2 to register and is organised by a new club on the block called Club Jeux. Admire them for the way they've seemed to have created a buzz about their club that ELL Club hasn't. Then again, we have different objectives: theirs revolve around fun and games, ours are more pragmatic, shall we say.

Also came played a different version of the game in KL. Involved updated locations in London to reflect its modern places, raising the stakes to the millions and having a cashless system involving Cash Cards that can be credited and debited. Certainly better than fighting over who doesn't want to be banker.

Women rule!

Alright, just to balance up. =]
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Silent Treatment
A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each other the silent treatment.
Suddenly, the man realized that the next day, he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early morning business flight.
Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and lose), he wrote on a piece of paper, 'Please wake me at 5:00 AM.' He left it where he knew she would find it.
The next morning, the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM and he had missed his flight.
Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife hadn't wakened him, when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed.
The paper said, 'It is 5:00 AM. Wake up.'
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Wife vs Husband
A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word.
An earlier discussion had led to an argument and neither of them wanted to concede their position.
As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs, the husband asked sarcastically, 'Relatives of yours?'
'Yep,' the wife replied, 'in-laws.'
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Women's Revenge
'Cash, check or charge?' I asked, after folding items the woman wished to purchase.
As she fumbled for her wallet I noticed a remote control for a television set in her purse.
'So, do you always carry your TV remote?' I asked.
'No,' she replied, ' but my husband refused to come shopping with me, and I figured this was the most evil thing I could do to him legally.'
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Understanding Women: A Man's Perspective
I'll never understand how you can take boiling hot wax, pour it onto your upper thigh, rip the hair out by the root, and still be afraid of a spider.
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Words
A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a day: 30 000 to a man's 15 000.
The wife replied, 'The reason has to be because we have to repeat everything to men.
The husband then turned to his wife and asked, 'What?'
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Creation
A man said to his wife one day, 'I don't know how you can be so stupid and so beautiful all at the same time.'
The wife responded, 'Allow me to explain.
God made me beautiful so you would be attracted to me;
God made me stupid so I would be attracted to you!
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Who Does What
A man and his wife were having an argument about who should brew the coffee each morning.
The wife said, 'You should do it, because you get up first, and then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee.'
The husband said, ' You are in charge of cooking around here and you should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my coffee.'
Wife replies, 'No, you should do it, and besides, it is in the Bible that the man should do the coffee.'
Husband replies, 'I can't believe that, show me.'
So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament and showed him at the top of several pages, that it indeed says "Hebrews".
------------
Final Draft
God may have created man before woman, but there is always a rough draft before the masterpiece.

Student-centred learning? Engaged students?

You know, for all the diatribe that NIE spouts about student-centred learning and engaging students, they sure do a poor job of giving us engaging activities in a certain module. Quite auntie lah, let's put it that way.

Absolutely inconsistent with accepting reasons for latecoming. An MRT breakdown is acceptable, but a massive jam caused by an accident on the BKE is not. Go figure, and WAKE UP. Drones on and on regardless of the paralinguistic hints from students of nodding heads and intra-group backchat. As a result the whole atmosphere of the class is down in the dumps and the joy of learning has been dashed on the rocks. We can't wait for class to end and take our 10-minute break that is MANDATORY when we need it, since it is happily ignored. It seems that only children need to be engaged, but not teachers. Way to go.

Ants!

NO not the movie. Facing an ant proliferation in my room and in our house in general. Ants stress me out; not good for my skin. But I've to keep squishing them on my table, on the wall, in the bathroom, in the kitchen: they're everywhere! Spraying insectiside brings only temporary relief. They're surviving mainly because they're so small and reproduce in such great numbers. No matte how many you kill, the queen ant will produce more. Down with the queen! I HATE ANTS! Add to the hate list those irritating rubbish flies, ticks and spiders. Found them at one point or another in my room.

Andy Roddick gets in on the act

Handy Andy tries to get in on Novak's monopoly by taking on John McEnroe and Andre Agassi. He declined to do a Roger though.

Beezus & Ramona by Beverly Cleary

Another excellent book from the reading list, this time with dealing issues with family love and sibling library. Even though this was written 53 years ago when 'gay' had a different widespread meaning and is used frequently to describe chracters' dispositions, this book describes 9-year-old Beatrice's (Ramona pronounces it as Beezus) frustration with the logical yet infuriatingly incorrect behaviour of her 4-year-old sister Ramona. Children will have so much to say and write about dealing with situations like this.

Men's Rules

Now here are the rules from the male side. These are our rules! They're all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
1. Men are NOT mind readers.
1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.
1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.
1. Crying is blackmail.
1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one. Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!
1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girl friends are for.
1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a Problem. See a doctor.
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.
1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing", we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.
1. When we have to go somewhere, anything you wear is absolutely fine. Really.
1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as CARS, SPORTS and occasionally SPORTS RESULTS.
1. You have enough clothes.
1. You have too many shoes.
1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
1. Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight. But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

Hatchet by Gary Paulsen

Found this book in the NIE library based on the recommendation of Gayle Whitson and Jason Loh, two excellent tutors who have unfortunately moved on from NIE. They did provide a stellar list of 25 children's books they recommended us to buy, and stingy old me didn't bat an eyelid. However as I was tutoring my P6 student in English, I realised the value and importance of inculcating the love of reading. I've just started him in Roald Dahl's Esio Trot. I think Hatchet might be a bridge too far at the moment.

Anyhow, an excellent book Hatchet is, though it was written more than 40 years ago. It provides excellent dilemmas for the main character, Brian Robesen, a city kid stranded by a plane crash in the Canadian wilderness. It charts his survival techniques and personal issues he must overcome if he is to survive the physical and emotional tribulation. It gives an excellent opportunity for kids to respond in writing and speaking on what they would do in his shoes, decision-making, overcoming crises attitudes toward work etc.

I can't wait to use it in a classroom, but must pluck up the confidence to do so. Incidentally, Brian's confidence was one of the issues that he faced early in the book. A really uplifting read.

Novak Djokovic the doppleganger

Novak Djokovic impersonates Andy Roddick, "Pistol" Pete Sampras, Maria Sharapova, Rafael Nadal, Goran Ivanisevic and Lleyton Hewitt, among others, while practising at Queens in 2007.


Now he's fooling around with some Argentinean players before his match with Stepanek at the 2007 US Open. Spot the stars! Roger Federer, Roddick again, Sharapova again, Nadal again... Relak lah, brudder. =]

Create your own font!

Pardon my ignorance if this is already widely known; I've never been a technocrat. You can scan your handwriting and create a font based on your own handwriting!

Apparently you can scan it in and buy the font for USD9. I'm seriously considering it. Too bad my handwriting's mostly illegible. =[

Get it at http://www.fontifier.com/

Pangrams

"The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog" is a 35-letter pangram (a phrase that uses all the letters of the alphabet) that has been used to test typewriters and computer keyboards because it is nicely coherent and short.

In Windows XP, an alternative message Jackdaws love my big sphinx of quartz. 123456890 is added.
Adapted from Wikipedia
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There also exist perfect pangrams, where every letter is used only once.

These are some without proper nouns, acronyms, or abbreviations:
Veldt jynx grimps waqf zho buck. (A grasslands wryneck Woodpecker climbs onto a male bovid on Muslim land held in trust. - created by Michael Jones)
Junky qoph-flags vext crwd zimb. (An Abyssinian fly playing a Celtic violin was annoyed by trashy flags on which were the Hebrew letter qoph.)
Cwm fjord bank glyphs vext quiz. (Carved symbols in a mountain hollow and on the bank of a fjord irritated an eccentric person.)
Squdgy fez, blank jimp crwth vox! (A short brimless felt hat barely blocks out the sound of a Celtic violin. - created by Claude Shannon)

Confused? Here are some with proper nouns, acronyms, or abbreviations that'll make it more readable:
PR flacks quiz gym: TV DJ box when?
NBC glad. Why? Fox TV jerks quiz PM.
Blowzy night-frumps vex'd Jack Q.
Glum Schwartzkopf vex'd by NJ IQ.

Err, maybe not. =]
Adapted from Wikipedia

Zeno's paradox

Among the most famous of Zeno's "paradoxes" involves Achilles and the tortoise, who are going to run a race. Achilles, being confident of victory, gives the tortoise a head start. Zeno supposedly proves that Achilles can never overtake the tortoise.

Achilles gives the tortoise a head start, in a race. Before he can overtake the tortoise, he must run to the place where the tortoise began, and the tortoise has move on to some other point. From there, before he can overtake the tortoise, he must run to the place where the tortoise had move on to. This goes on forever, and Achilles can never pass the tortoise.

Here, I paraphrase Zeno's argument:
Before Achilles can overtake the tortoise, he must first run to point A, where the tortoise started. But then the tortoise has crawled to point B. Now Achilles must run to point B. But the tortoise has gone to point C, etc. Achilles is stuck in a situation in which he gets closer and closer to the tortoise, but never catches him.

A finite length can be divided up into an infinite number of pieces, all of zero length. You can imagine that, can't you. Just divide a length into halves, then fourths, then eighths, etc. But, in the Zeno story above, we find that none of the pieces is of zero length.


Here is an animation which counts to infinity in 8 seconds. Actually, I cheated. There are not an infinite number of frames in this animation. I skipped 1/100 second (approximately). "1" takes 4 seconds, "2" takes 2 seconds, "3" is 1 sec., then .5 sec., .25 sec., etc. If our computers were infinitely faster, we could get in infinitely many frames in that 8 seconds.
Adapted from http://www.jimloy.com/physics/zeno.htm

Therefore, there must be a finite number of pieces. Hence, this finite number of pieces is coverable in a finite amount of time, since the nett speed (subtract the tortoise's speed from Achilles' speed) is obviously greater than zero i.e. Achilles is faster than the tortoise. This proves that Achilles can overtake the tortoise eventually. Effectively, Achilles will overtake the tortoise when t = headstart/nett speed.

The question is when, and whether he'll do so before running out of time or distance to do so. There are therefore three different outcomes to this farcical race. To quote a gameshow, it is Achilles' race to win, lose or draw, interestingly all dependent on the finishing line's position. Even with so many unknowns, it is actually possible to establish mathematical inequalities to demonstrate the three outcomes.

Basically, there is a tie when headstart of tortoise + speed of tortoise x time given = speed of Achilles x time given. Here, time is obviously the time taken for the tortoise to reach the finishing line, since he is in effect winning from the start of the race.

Making the time given the subject of the equation,
The tortoise wins if: t > nett difference of speed divided by headstart
Achilles wins if: t < nett difference of speed divided by headstart
Draw if: t = nett difference of speed divided by headstart

I end this discussion with Jim Loy's little anecdote:

Little-known story: Achilles didn't win the above race. So, he challenged the tortoise to a pole vault competition, double or nothing. The tortoise's pole bent impressively, before it catapulted him out of Greece, never to be seen again. I made that one up.

The New Paper's Santokh Singh on teacher ranking

I like this guy. He always has something fresh and interesting to say about our education system.

This time round, he champions a 360-degree ranking system, which includes one's superiors, peers and subordinates. For teachers, these are their principal, HODs and level heads (though not necessarilt the most level-headed), fellow teachers and students respectively. Oh well, as long as it doesn't degenerate into a farcical popularity contest. Some would say being the best does not make you the most popular, but I say it is possible to do both.

Secondly, he suggests that D-grade teachers be given the option of moderation by MOE. What good this will do I don't know, but at least it allows the avenue of appeal and belays the excessive authority of the principal. S/he has that much of variable wage component to give out to her staff leh.

Alexandre "The Duck" Pato

Is Milan's Brazil wunderkind worth the hype? You decide.

United 6-0 Newcastle

Cristiano Ronaldo finally gets a treble. Why did I sell Tevez?!

Election (Hei1 she4 hui4)

Flixster Plot: ELECTION is Hong Kong's answer to The Godfather. Amidst the modern world mixed with old tradition, The Wo Shing Triad exists in Hong Kong, its shadowy power intertwined everywhere. Every two years, an election is held to vote in the next Chairman, who is the leader of the largest and oldest Triad in Hong Kong. Big D (Tony Leung Kar Fai), a megalomaniac and violent leader squares off against the respected and level headed Lok (Simon Yam) for the Election. In order to gain the respect of the groups, Lok and Big D unleash their forces in search of the Dragon Baton, the traditonal symbol of power and authority of the Chairman, and war breaks loose until the baton is recovered. Also starring Louis Koo, Nick Cheung and Cheung Siu Fai, ELECTION throws you into the dark underworld of Hong Kong and China in the midst of a battle for power and supremacy.

My take: This is cool. =]

The Ultimate Gift

Flixster plot: When his wealthy grandfather dies, trust fund baby Jason Stevens anticipates a big inheritance. Instead, his grandfather has devised a crash course on life with 12 tasks--or "gifts"--designed to challenge Jason in improbable ways, sending him on a journey of self-discovery and forcing him to determine what is most important in life: money or happiness.

My take: Better than expected. Real lessons here.

My grandfather

I finally cried. It happened at the Leaders' Retreat when I was watching The Ultimate Gift that included a part where a grandfather had recorded his message for his grandson. Then I remembered Enkong. Better late than never. Bless his soul.
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I realised I was probably about the only one who didn't shed a tear. Is it that I'm able to keep my emotions in check or that I'm pretty emotionless? Then when some kid's hands got shut on by the piano cover, I callously said that he deserved it for playing where he shouldn't be playing. I think I'll make an excellent father.
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Have reached KL and glad to see that everyone is positve about the whole thing. When someone dies and has gone to meet Jesus, it becomes more of a celebration. =] Funeral's on Thu and scattering of ashes on the sea is on Fri. Should be back by Sat or Sun.
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My grandpa has passed away on X'mas Day. I'm just glad he's no longer suffering and is with Jesus now. Rushing back to KL now.
Merry Christmas, y'all.
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My grandpa's back home at my uncle's place in KL having been discharged. He's feeling a bit better now and I believe the environment will do him good. My mum's managed to take a week off to visit him there. Pray for a complete recovery.
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Finally back in S'pore and it'd been a relaxing yet stressful time there. Stayed in the most luxurious of houses (thank you, Linda and Tan) but yet had my grandfather's health on my mind, despite plenty of window shopping and sightseeing.
Briefly recceed the Avillion resort at Port Dickson. This one is really a class above everything else. I mean, lawn tennis?! Only stickler is the potential high cost. Let's see what the agent can offer us.
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Change of plan: Jasmine, Sharon, my mum, Yewhock & I are only going on Wed morning and staying till goodness knows when. My cousin's dream and my granddad's cryptic indication of 'five days' on 1 Dec makes 6 Dec very important. He could die or get better. Whatever happens, we know he is saved and that's what matters. Looks like I have to give Thu's prayer meeting and Sun service a miss, as we'll probably link up with the recce team in KL, and henceforth to Fraser's Hill and Port Dickson. Who knew I'd be so busy this holiday?
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I should be going with Jasmine next week from Mon-Wed. Pretty apprehensive about going by ourselves.
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Please pray for my grandfather as he's really ill. Went to the doctor for a checkup and found that the haemoglobin (iron) in his blood is half the normal level. Also, my cousin dreamt that he would pass away on 6 Dec. If this is true, then it's a message to my family and I that we can't delay visiting him in Malaysia any longer, leave and schedules notwithstanding. Pray for God's healing and for his faith in God to strengthen.

Beards and sex

"How fast a man's beard grows ... is partly a function of how much he thinks about sex [because thinking about sex produces a testosterone surge]."
- Bill Bryson in A Short History of Nearly Everything

Know any men with rapid beard growth? Anyone who's shaved in the morning but looks like he hasn't? Hmmm.

GROW 2.0

MOE has made it more attractive to be and stay a teacher. Not much, but progress is progress.

I like the fact that they are recognising more part-time degrees unrelated to education. This includes study grants and full-pay/no-pay leave in the interest of professional development. There are also enhancements to the Connect plan, performance-related bonuses and salary increment scales (with regards to market wage benchmarks).

Read all of it here.

GROWTH
Professional Development Packages
Greater Support for Postgraduate Studies
More In-Service Upgrading Opportunities for Non-Graduate Teachers

RECOGNITION
New Education Scheme of Service (2008)
Revised CONNECT Plan
Additional Outstanding Contribution Awards

OPPORTUNITIES
Enhanced Senior Specialist Track
Further Re-employment Opportunities
Future Leaders Programme

WELL-BEING
Expansion of Part-time Teaching Scheme
Greater Support for Part-time Teaching
Enhancements to No-Pay Leave

Rodrigo y Gabriela - Stairway to Heaven

KL = Kurangkan Laju

Saw my dad si chia like FIVE times, four times in S'pore alone driving Uncle Johnny's car. He wasn't used to the biting point of the clutch. It happens to the best of us. =]
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I have finally discovered why Kuala Lumpur is so infamous for its jams and traffic congestions. KL actually stands for kurangkan laju, which you see on Malaysian roads everywhere. It means slow down and everyone dutifully obliges.

Eczema update

Despite a humid and active day at Ker Toh Loh, managed not to scratch a lot. Am relying on Cetirizine, an oral anti-histamine, in the absence of Prednisalone. Must rest, eat and hydrate well in the meantime.
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There seems to be a trend. The steroids work for the first week, then the effect starts to tail off. Tomorrow's the last day of steroids and hence it's off to Dr Hia again. I can just feel the eczema being suppressed, though it's still there. I can feel it. But I pray it stays away even though I get off steroids. I can't continue like this.
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Steroids have never worked so well. I haven't enjoyed such quality of life for a long while. I pray this will be the first step to getting some semblance of a life back. But going out today with no flannel, cream or even a bag was liberating. One more week of this and I'm off it, so I wanna make the most of it. Then have to monitor my progress.
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I am ultra-susceptible to heatiness and its causes nowadays. A late night, too much or too little sleep, the wrong food, stress, or no reason whatsoever: anything could trigger an outbreak. Outbreaks usually mean inflamed skin and extreme itchiness, followed by extreme exfoliation and widespread exfoliation or peeling. The amount of dead skin I sweep up each day is literally by the handful.

My upper lip area and ears refuse to heal or even dry and remain distinctly uncomfortable, itchy and unpleasant to look at. I probably don't mind the eczema on the limbs, but the face is really a bummer.

I am unable to take part in any activities that cause me to sweat or increase my heart rate, which obviously includes football and any active sport. My eyes water and tire easily because of rhinitis and my nose constantly runs because of sinitis; both conditions are linked to the eczema. Any shock I get, like a loud noise, brings a rush of blood to my head, which makes it itchy all over again.

All these symptoms are being treated by a concoction of Chinese herbs and medicine that constitutes a systematic and long-term approach to healing. It costs about $250 each month, so I'm glad my parents are helping out with $200. I also use wet towels with ice to alleviate the itch, though I can only do so for 20 minutes at a time before I need to moisturise, as the skin gets extremely dry.

I constantly receive well-meaning comments about how bad I look and recommended cures, which I can't ignore because they are borne of good intention.

I hate this eczema from the bottom of my heart and the depth of my soul. I urge you to pray with me whenever you think of me:

"Lord, I claim Your healing for Aaron in Jesus' name for You are Jehovah Rapha - God our Healer (Exo 15:26). I trust in Your promise of healing which You have given Aaron when you said that he will 'laugh' at his condition in days to come (Job 8:21-22). I rebuke the eczema and declare that it has no place in the Temple of the Holy Spirit (1Co 6:19). I also declare that all food is God-made and is not impure (Act 11:9), and that Aaron will not suffer any side effect even when eating foods he is supposedly allergic to. I pray You will give him peaceful sleep (Psa 127:2), improve his condition and complexion, and remove the itchiness. In Jesus' name I pray, Amen!"

Ker Toh Loh?

Success! Think basically almost everyone enjoyed themselves, got to know one another better and is now more familiar with the Park Mall area.
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Was a little disappointed at the number of people signing up and the lack of things done with so little time left. But it's not my baby so must learn to relax. Must learn to trust the people I empower. Fingers crossed for New Year's Day.
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Not sure how to spell it, but that's the name of our latest outing to celebrate our move to Park Mall. Teams will get to explore the area around Park Mall and familiarise themselves with places to eat, play and fellowship. Should be a blast.

The only shame is not being able to take part as we're organising it. =[

Maria Sharapova Live!

What a damp squib this turned out to be. Pity the sods who coughed up $180 for nothing. I don't think it sold very well as many people seemed to possess 'complimentary' tickets. The first set almost turned into a walkover, with the Chakvetadze serve particularly vulnerable. Anna found her rhythm in the second set though, as the crowd got behind her to encourage a three-setter. In the pulsating tie-breaker, the crowd broke into two factions: the pro-Maria one who wanted to go home and the pro-Anna one who wanted to see more tennis. Well, after more than 20 points, Maria finally obliged and held her serve on match point to conclude the 94-minute walk in the park.

As to whether Singapore is ready for a ATP or WTA Tour event, I don't think so. Some hecklers were keen to show off their knowledge of tennis players whose fame is only exceeded by their complete irrelevance. Where do Messrs. Federer and Roddick fit in here anyhow? Any they seem to have a propensity to cheer Anna and Maria using their surnames. I mean, that's like saying "C'mon, Wong!" Yeah, that would really spur me on. And to do it when they preparing to serve? Take those people out and burn them at the stake.

The ballpersons were another sticking point. Their pace was glacial at best and they seemed too enthralled by Maria to realise they were there to pick balls fast. At one point they were feeding balls to Anna when it was Maria's turn to serve. If these jokers are the future of Singapore tennis, then I must say there's tunnel at the end of the light.

Finally, I was appalled at the number of people who left early. I mean, show some respect lah, traffic jam notwithstanding. This is not exactly Malaysia Cup, right? And to hear Anna and Maria glibly saying they loved the Singapore crowd just showed their tolerance of Neanderthal behaviour.

I'm just glad I got my ticket free.

Monster House

Flixster Plot: Although no adults will believe them, three children realize a neighbor's house is really a monster. They must find a way to stop the house and save the neighborhood.

My take: Quite OK lah. Watched because of my nieces and nephews.

Click

Flixster Plot: A workaholic architect, who has been overlooking his family in favor of his career, comes across a universal remote that allows him to perform TiVo-like functions on his life, such as pausing events or fast-forwarding over them. When the remote begins creating its own memory and choosing what to fast-forward over, the man sees how much of his personal life has passed him by and realizes the importance of spending more time with his family.

My take: Thought it'd be a funny one. Turned out to be a moralistic guilt trip.

Pacifier

Flixster Plot: As an elite member of the world's fiercest and most highly trained fighting force, Navy SEAL Shane Wolfe thought he was prepared to take on any duty, no matter how perilous or impossible… until he tried baby-sitting. Assigned to protect the five out-of-control children of an assassinated scientist, who had been working on vital government secrets, Shane is suddenly faced with juggling two outrageously incompatible jobs -- fighting the bad guys and keeping house. Replacing his usual arsenal of wetsuits and weapons with diapers and juice boxes, Shane not only must battle a deceptive enemy but wrangle teen rebel Zoe, sullen 14-year-old Seth, eight-year-old Ninja-wanna-be Lulu, as well as three-year-old Peter and baby Tyler -- not to mention their off-beat Romanian Nanny. He's truly a SEAL out of water, and now it's up to this one-time lone warrior to take on the most important mission of his life: keeping a family together.

My take: Scarcely believable, but pretty funny.

The Exodus

I sometimes feel like talking to the people who are leaving and hearing from them directly about their reasons for leaving. If anything, this would represent a chance to express my final disappointment in their departure, whether or not my opinion means anything to them. I just need to say it, if that makes any sense. I guess I will wait till after the Leaders' Retreat where I can get a better idea of what is going on. I have learnt to wait for the right time.

My goal is not to persuade them to stay, for that will be doomed to failure. I just look at it as closure for myself.

Just as a reminder to myself, the people I want to talk to are the Powerpuff Girls, Mojo Jojo and their underlings.

Exam Results: Yr 2, Sem 1

DCE200: B
DCM200: A-
DED200: A-
DLK200: A-
DSE200: B+
DSM200: A
Cumulative GPA: 4.45 [down from 4.54]

A little disappointed but otherwise pretty good apart from the Bs.

Jaco Pastorius

Jaco Pastorius with bass harmonics & improv.

Monsterpiece Theater with Alistair Cookie

Anyone old enough to remember this?

GEMS Retreat

What a wonderful time we had at retreat. You could see everyone just forging bonds and bulidling friendships with one another in such an environment. A special word for Yewhock, who conducted the games and activities impressively despite it being his debut. Many thanks to Angela and Jackson, who made special effort to come despite prior commitments.

We kept to the budget of $60/head for the retreat [excluding Pastor's gift] and I'm impressed with the proficiency and fluency each committee member went about his/her job, despite a tight schedule and personal commitments.

Of course there's room for improvement, and we'll look into these areas in time for planning for the next retreat.

Finally, I thank God for His providence during the retreat: good weather, wisdom in sharing sensitive issues, willingness of people to help and perticipate... the list goes on.

We now look forward and shift our attention to our ambitious telematch programme on New Year's Day, which we will organise with the youth. Here's to another sucessful event!
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Well here we go. All the planning and it comes down to this. I'm reasonably satisfied with the work we've put in as a committee and have also learnt much about the work attitudes of my committee. This will help when I do an evaluation at the end of the year.

Pray for God's hand to move in the retreat. The rest is up to Him.

The Terminal

Flixster Plot: Like an airport running at peak efficiency, The Terminal glides on the consummate skills of its director and star. Having refined their collaborative chemistry on Saving Private Ryan and Catch Me if You Can, Steven Spielberg and Tom Hanks mesh like the precision gears of a Rolex, turning a delicate, not-very-plausible scenario into a lovely modern-age fable (partly based on fact) that's both technically impressive and subtly moving. It's Spielberg in Capra mode, spinning the featherweight tale of Victor Navorski (Hanks, giving a finely tuned performance), an Eastern European who arrives at New York's Kennedy Airport just as his (fictional) homeland has fallen to a coup, forcing him, with no valid citizenship, to take indefinite residence in the airport's expansive International Arrivals Terminal (an astonishing full-scale set that inspires Spielberg's most elegant visual strategies). Spielberg said he made this film in part to alleviate the anguish of wartime America, and his master's touch works wonders on the occasionally mushy material; even Stanley Tucci's officious terminal director and Catherine Zeta-Jones's mixed-up flight attendant come off (respectively) as forgivable and effortlessly charming. With this much talent involved, The Terminal transcends its minor shortcomings to achieve a rare degree of cinematic grace. --Jeff Shannon

My take: Thoroughly enjoyable. Held me in thrall throughout.

Happy birthday to me!

Many thanks to all the people who have wished me. God bless you for remembering! The only thing I want from God for my birthday is to be healed of my eczema. Pray or me whenever you can. =]

Rev James Singh's sermon on Simeon

Here's my two cents' worth on Simeon.

I can identify with the broken hands. God has given me a promise with regards to my healing, but it gets harder and harder to hold on to with each passing day that sees no progress. I have to keep asking God for His strength to pull through and keep believing in His healing. God help me to have a breakthrough. Help me hold on.

Mona Lisa Smile

Flixster plot: In 1953, a time when women's roles were rigidly defined, free-spirited, novice art history professor Katherine Watson begins teaching at the prestigious all-female Wellesley College--which despite its academic reputation, is an environment where success is measured by 'how well' the students marry. Encouraging these women to strive for a more enlightened future, Watson challenges the administration and inspires her students to look beyond the image of what is, and consider the possibilities of what could be--contrary to popular belief.

My take: Pithy, but a little underdeveloped. Not too much to chew on either. Still, a constructive use of two hours.

Super Mario theme

Super Mario theme on two electric guitars!

Super Mario in 5 minutes

How to finish Super Mario in 5 minutes!

10 Commandments: The Musical

Flixster plot: The story of Moses from the Bible in musical form, filmed live at the Hollywood Kodak Theater.

My take: Val Kilmer can't sing.

Bolton 1-0 United

We deserved at least a share of the spoils, but kudos to Bolton for really getting stuck in, harrying and harassing their more illustrious opponents. Despite dropping three points and getting sent off (which could mean a touchline ban), Fergie will have many lessons to draw from this loss.

1. Gerard Pique is not Premiership material and must be dropped like a hot potato. He makes Michael Carrick look like The Flash and can't win a header to save his life. He was badly at fault for Bolton's goal as he flew through the air to head thin air, the ball dropping kindly for Nicolas Anelka to sweep in. He then repeated his stunt two more times after that, thankfully with no further consequences than to leave Rio Ferdinand hoping that Nemanja Vidic or even Mickael 'Heart Attack Man' Silvestre was there to partner him. He was soon hauled off for Anderson, Fergie deeming him a liability. Move either John O'Shea or Wes Brown to centreback in an emergency, and kick Pique back to Zaragoza.

2. Owen Hargreaves must take the free-kicks from now on. He forced more saves out of the keeper from a dead-ball situation than Cristiano Ronaldo has the entire season. For the record, Jussi Jaaskelainen only had one save to make, though a far-post effort seemed to leave him stranded as it shaved the bar.

3. Anderson must play more games. United only came afire when the enigmatic Brazilian came on. For all of Carrick's vaunted range of passing, it took the ex-Porto man to really stretch Bolton with long passes to the right wing.

4. Carlos Tevez is no Ruud van Nistelrooy and Fergie needs to buy a targetman in January. He missed another one-yard sitter to condemn United to their second defeat of the season.

5. Put the new players through boot camp. Where United's old guard would get fired up from the challenges that were flying in from the likes of Kevin Davies, we saw Patrice Evra, all wrapped up against the cold, complaining bitterly about a strong but fair challenge from the Bolton hardman. Coupled with Anderson and Nani's incessant turf-rolling, this is looking embarrassing.

Happy 3rd Anniversary!

Wow, it's been three years! And every one of those 1,095 days, I thank God for your patience, tolerance and care. I'm looking forward to the rest of my life with you. =]

Sad, sad England

And so England are out of Euro 2008 before it's even started. What strikes me is how apathetic I am towards their fate, despite being an England fan. Mostly it's due to the fact that don't deserve to be there based on their capitulations in the matches that mattered.

And so I now begin the unenviable task of finding an alternative team next year.

On another note, why not Raddy Avramovic for England manager?

Testimonial match for Amara

Yes, we may have played our last match at Amara. The score was immaterial (7-3 for the record), and there was an excellent spirit all around. A little muddy perhaps, but it was tolerable.

I was not supposed to play at all, as my skin is still dodgy, but I played in goal for a while as the teams were numerically imbalanced. Imagine playing in leather shoes, trousers and white shirt, at the mercy of the other team's misfiring strikers. I got through unscathed after 20 minutes.

I'm glad Ben arranged this match. It was important to end the football this year on a good note. A note too for Matthew, who put aside his feelings to join us. He kept dedicating his goals to Samuel by pointing to the sky, till I reminded him that Samuel was still alive, though not kicking.

When we move to Park Mall, it remains to be seen where we can play. Perhaps Fort Canning? I anticipate picking up loose balls won't be fun.

Lady in the Water

Flixster plot: A modest building manager named Cleveland Heep rescues a mysterious young woman from danger and discovers she is actually a narf, a character from a bedtime story who is trying to make the treacherous journey from our world back to hers. Cleveland and his fellow tenants start to realize that they are also characters in this bedtime story. As Cleveland falls deeper and deeper in love with the woman, he works together with the tenants to protect his new fragile friend from the deadly creatures that reside in this fable and are determined to prevent her from returning home.

My take: Overly convoluted and incredible.

Erik Mongrain - Lap tapping

Ze Neu English

The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.
As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5-year phase-in plan that would become known as 'Euro-English'.
In the first year, 's' will replace the soft 'c'. Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard 'c' will be dropped in favour of 'k'. This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter. There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome 'ph' will be replaced with 'f'. This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.
In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.
Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent 'e' in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.
By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing 'th' with 'z' and 'w' with 'v'.
During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary 'o' kan be dropd from vords kontaining 'ou' and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas!

Splitting the cab fare

Came across some interesting mathematical articles on the fairest way of sharing a cab.

Take a look at these links:
http://www.tagxe.com/How.jsp
http://everything2.com/index.pl?node_id=739831
http://online.wsj.com/public/article/SB113279169439805647-jP1H4pfk3i2ACypy26ghtvTlJ30_20061207.html

Facing the Giants

Flixster Plot: A Christian high school football coach uses his undying faith to battle the giants of fear and failure. In six years of coaching, Grant Taylor has never led his Shiloh Eagles to a winning season. After learning that he and his wife Brooke face infertility, Grant discovers that a group of fathers are secretly organizing to have him dismissed as head coach. Devastated by his circumstances, he cries out to God in desperation. When Grant receives a message from an unexpected visitor, he searches for a stronger purpose for his football team. He dares to challenge his players to believe God for the impossible on and off the field. When faced with unbelievable odds, the Eagles must step up to their greatest test of strength and courage. What transpires is a dynamic story of the fight between faith and fear. "Facing the Giants" is a powerful experience for the whole family inspiring viewers to live with faith, hope, and love.

My take:
Learnt a lot from this movie:
1. Life's not just about us.
2. Praise Him when we lose, praise Him when we win.
3. Nothing is impossible with God.
4. Having prayed for something, preparing to receive it takes even more faith.
5. Put in your best: leave nothing out on the field.

ORD loh!

Yes two years ago to this day, I became a civilian. And I've never looked back.

Mars in 2020

Ratatouille

Plot from Flixster: Academy Award®-winning director Brad Bird (“The Incredibles”) and the amazing storytellers at Pixar Animation Studios (“Cars,” “Finding Nemo”) take you into an entirely new and original world where the unthinkable combination of a rat and a 5-star gourmet restaurant come together for the ultimate fish-out-of-water tale. In the hilarious new animated-adventure, RATATOUILLE, a rat named Remy dreams of becoming a great chef despite his family’s wishes and the obvious problem of being a rat in a decidedly rodent-phobic profession. When fate places Remy in the city of Paris, he finds himself ideally situated beneath a restaurant made famous by his culinary hero, Auguste Gusteau. Despite the apparent dangers of being an unwanted visitor in the kitchen at one of Paris’ most exclusive restaurants, Remy forms an unlikely partnership with Linguini, the garbage boy, who inadvertently discovers Remy’s amazing talents. They strike a deal, ultimately setting into motion a hilarious and exciting chain of extraordinary events that turns the culinary world of Paris upside down. Remy finds himself torn between following his dreams or returning forever to his previous existence as a rat. He learns the truth about friendship, family and having no choice but to be who he really is, a rat who wants to be a chef.
My take: Love the animation, but love the storyline more. =]
There's a Linguini in all of us.
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Whodathunkit?

I've eaten ratatouille before I've seen it. A delicious vegetable stew at Soup Spoon.

Word games

The Washington Post's Mensa Invitational once again asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition. Here are this year's winners.


Read them carefully. Each is an artificial word with only one letter altered to form a real word. Some are terrifically innovative:


1. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.

2. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.

3. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people, that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The Bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.

4. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period of time.

5. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.

6. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.

7. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.

8. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.

9. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.)

10. Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer.

11. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you.

12. Glibido: All talk and no action.

13. Dopeler Effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.

14. Arachnoleptic Fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.

15. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.

16. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a worm in the fruit you're eating.

And, the pick of the lot...

17. Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an asshole.

Bourne Identity

Plot: The spy thriller opens as an amnesiac is rescued at sea by the crew of an Italian fishing boat. Nearly dead, he carries nothing but the bullets in his back and the bank account number embedded in his hip. Although completely without identity or background, he possesses an array of extraordinary talents in fighting, linguistics and self-defense that speaks of a dangerous past. In the present he is disoriented and wary as he is propelled into an urgent search to discover who he is and why his life has taken a perilous turn. A Zurich safe deposit box yields an assortment of passports, a hefty load of cash, an automatic weapon and a name--Jason Bourne--with a Paris address. What it means remains a mystery, but Bourne quickly realizes that although he knows no one, there are people who recognize him--and do not wish him well. When he meets Marie Kreutz, a hard-luck German-born wanderer, he makes a desperate pitch--$10,000 for a ride to Paris. Despite her reservations, Marie takes the cash and begins a journey with Bourne that changes her life forever. The trail of Jason Bourne's past snakes from Europe to CIA headquarters in Langley, Virginia, where Treadstone, a clandestine operation is based. As Bourne and Marie struggle to stay below the radar in France, all of the stealthy muscle of Treadstone is focused on tracking them and neutralizing Bourne as quickly and efficiently as possible.
My take: Very different action movie.

Maid in Manhattan

In the breezy Maid in Manhattan, a maid in a top-flight hotel (Jennifer Lopez, Out of Sight, The Wedding Planner) chances to dress in a guest's clothes just when a handsome political candidate (Ralph Fiennes, Schindler's List, Red Dragon) walks in. Naturally, he's bowled over and pursues her; he's initially drawn to her gorgeous good looks but soon comes to appreciate her honesty and common sense. Of course, she can't let him know that she's only a maid, and various high jinks ensue--it's all pretty formulaic, but lurking in the edges of this glossy, brainless romance are a wealth of sly turns by Natasha Richardson and Amy Sedaris (as callow socialites), Bob Hoskins (as a dignified butler), Stanley Tucci (as Fiennes' exasperated campaign manager), and many less familiar faces. All help to give Maid in Manhattan the life and texture that has been processed out of the main characters. --Bret Fetzer
My take: Super-cliched.

SOD: Masterlife 1

Guess who's teaching Masterlife 1? Wah lesson plans all over again!

I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry

Flixster plot:
Adam Sandler (Click) and Kevin James (Hitch) team as two straight guys who stumble down the aisle with the best of intentions in I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry. Chuck Levine (Sandler) and Larry Valentine (James) are the pride of their fire station: two guy’s guys always side-by-side and willing to do anything for each other. Salt-of-the-earth widower Larry wants just one thing: to protect his family. His buddy Chuck also wants one thing: to enjoy the single life.

Grateful Chuck owes Larry for saving his life in a fire, and Larry calls in that favor big time when civic red tape prevents him from naming his own two kids as his life insurance beneficiaries. All that Chuck has to do is claim to be Larry’s domestic partner on some city forms. Easy. Nobody will ever know.

But when an overzealous, spot-checking bureaucrat becomes suspicious, the new couple’s arrangement becomes a citywide issue and goes from confidential to front-page news. Forced to improvise as love-struck newlyweds, Chuck and Larry must now fumble through a hilarious charade of domestic bliss under one roof. After surviving their mandatory honeymoon and dodging the threat of exposure, the well-intentioned con men discover that sticking together in your time of need is what truly makes a family.

My take:
This was the funniest comedy I've watched in the longest time. Chuck and Larry trying to act like a gay firefighter couple was pure hilarity.

TP practical

I'VE PASSED!!! 10 points!
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This is it. At 1230hrs tomorrow (18 Sep), I will know if I have passed my driving. I don't even know how well I must drive to pass, so I'll just do my best.

A Call for Passion

The concert went well in the end. Though there were a few nervous hiccups, the concert achieved all its objectives. Perhaps another one mext year? =]
PS: Juwita Suwito looked so young and sounded so fantastic!

Snow City!

Went to Snow City with Rosyth's 4 Youthful and had a ball of a time. We made ice-cream with liquid nitrogen. Everyone wanted to go on the slide with me as they theorised that I was heavier and would go faster.
Thanks for the fun, guys!

Mastering Money

Continued with session 2 of Mastering Money with Gems after Vincent shared last week. Gems were more engaged this time with group work coming to the fore. They thoroughly enjoyed themselves and learnt useful things.

Busy, busy, busy

Ok there's jsut still school stuff left now. Still a lot though.
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There's just so much stuff to do for church [2 Mastering Money lessons], school [various assignments & interviews] & computer stuff [setup reformatted laptop]. And so little time. God help me.

Shot of the Century

World's easiest quiz ... NOT!

1) How long did the Hundred Years War last? 116 years
2) Which country makes Panama hats? Ecuador
3) From which animal do we get cat gut? Sheep and Horses
4) In which month do Russians celebrate the October Revolution? November
5) What is a camel's hair brush made of? Squirrel fur
6) The Canary Islands in the Pacific are named after what animal? Dogs
7) What was King George VI's first name? Albert
8) What color is a purple finch? Crimson
9) Where are Chinese gooseberries from? New Zealand
10) What is the color of the black box in a commercial airplane? Orange, of course!

Slow-mo popcorn

Slow-mo lighter

Federer Express ... NOT!

Yahoo Fantasy Football 2007/08

We have 24 teams! Biggest turnout so far!
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Managed to get 20 teams. Let's see if any more straggle in.
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We've got 15 teams and counting, so get on board and let's get the season started!
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Hi guys/gals,

It's that time of the year again where the EPL season starts to kick off. Once again, we vie for the title of champion of the Group of Death [4th edition]. I've won the last few so let's see who will challenge this year.

You have been invited to join aaroniemcwonley's Private Group in Yahoo! Sports Premiership.

In order to join the group, just go to the game front page and click on the "Sign Up" button to create a team. After completing registration, or if you already have a team, click the "Create or Join Group" button and follow the path to join an existing private group. Then, when prompted, enter the following information...

Group ID#: 2498
Password: 4444

http://uk.premiership.fantasysports.yahoo.com/football

Pool anyone?

How small we are

I hate war

The social studies teacher had just finished a chapter on war and peace.

"How many of you," he asked, "would say that you're opposed to war?"

All hands went up.

"Why are you against war?" the teacher continued.

A bored-looking boy at the back raised his hand.

"I hate war," he began, "because wars make history, and I hate history."

Animal sounds

A group of young children were sitting in a circle with their teacher. She was going around in turn asking them all questions.

First she asked, "Davy, what noise does a cow make?"

He responded, "It goes moo."

The she asked, "Alice, what noise does a cat make?"

Alice replied, "It goes meow."

Next she asked, "Jamie, what sound does a lamb make?"

Her response was, "It goes baa."

Finally she questioned one last child, "Jennifer, what sound does a mouse make?"

She replied, "Er, it goes ... click!"

Moral of the Story

Once upon a time, there was a non-conforming sparrow who decided not to fly south for the winder. However, the weather turned cold and he reluctantly started to fly south.

In a short time, ice began to form on his wings and he fell to earth into a barnyard, almost frozen. A cow wandered by and crapped on him. The sparrow thought it was the end. But, the manure warmed him and defrosted his wings.

Warm and happy, able to breathe, he started to sing. Just then, a large cat came by, following the birdsong, cleared away the manure, found the bird, and ate him.

The Moral of the Story:
1. Everyone who dumps on you is not necessarily your enemy.
2. Everyone who gets you out of the crap is not necessarily your friend.
3. And if you're warm and happy in a pile of manure, keep your mouth shut.

Obituary

This is an obituary for Aaron Wong, who died of boredom in an NIE tutorial room after four consecutive hours of mind-numbing teacher talk in psychology and mathematics patterns. On his deathbed, he made it clear that he didn't want a degree awarded by NIE, posthumous or otherwise.

Back at NIE

First day of school. Miss the friends, food and fellowship, but really dread the assignments, atrocious timetables and acrimonious travelling time.
Some of my friends have three-day work weeks and I'm stuck with five. Dang.

Road Trip

Went on a mini road trip today as I went to Rosyth, then tuition, then dinner with Jasmine on my trusty Motachie. Very fulfilling as I realise I will recoup my investment by saving on public transport in no time. Managed to clock 12.5km in just over an hour.

Keyball

A unique mix of bumber cars, Artoo-Detoo, street soccer and even pool to form this very addictive game. Took me weeks to get the hang of it. You'll find it'll improve your hand-eye coordination. Read the instructions first before starting.
Try Keyball here.

The Simpsons Movie

Plot from Flixster:
When Homer mistakenly pollutes the river with toxic waste from his "Pig Crap" silo, he causes the EPA to encase Springfield in a glass dome, and must save them before President Schwarzenegger gives the order for the town to be destroyed.

My take:
Full of in-jokes that made it enjoyable, but basically just a longer Simpsons episode with some 3D effects. As Homer put it, why are we paying to watch something we can watch on TV?

Prednisalone paramour

My steroids end tomorrow and there's been little improvement. Have to trust God to reduce the rebound effect. In the meantime, no comments that my skin looks worse, please. Do I look that I don't know? And no suggestions of treatment, too. I prefer to trust my God. Do tell me when things look better, though.
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Ah, yes, my good friend Prednisalone again. On 15mg steroids again for 2 weeks.