Wednesday, November 28, 2007

10 Commandments: The Musical

Flixster plot: The story of Moses from the Bible in musical form, filmed live at the Hollywood Kodak Theater.

My take: Val Kilmer can't sing.

Monday, November 26, 2007

Bolton 1-0 United

We deserved at least a share of the spoils, but kudos to Bolton for really getting stuck in, harrying and harassing their more illustrious opponents. Despite dropping three points and getting sent off (which could mean a touchline ban), Fergie will have many lessons to draw from this loss.

1. Gerard Pique is not Premiership material and must be dropped like a hot potato. He makes Michael Carrick look like The Flash and can't win a header to save his life. He was badly at fault for Bolton's goal as he flew through the air to head thin air, the ball dropping kindly for Nicolas Anelka to sweep in. He then repeated his stunt two more times after that, thankfully with no further consequences than to leave Rio Ferdinand hoping that Nemanja Vidic or even Mickael 'Heart Attack Man' Silvestre was there to partner him. He was soon hauled off for Anderson, Fergie deeming him a liability. Move either John O'Shea or Wes Brown to centreback in an emergency, and kick Pique back to Zaragoza.

2. Owen Hargreaves must take the free-kicks from now on. He forced more saves out of the keeper from a dead-ball situation than Cristiano Ronaldo has the entire season. For the record, Jussi Jaaskelainen only had one save to make, though a far-post effort seemed to leave him stranded as it shaved the bar.

3. Anderson must play more games. United only came afire when the enigmatic Brazilian came on. For all of Carrick's vaunted range of passing, it took the ex-Porto man to really stretch Bolton with long passes to the right wing.

4. Carlos Tevez is no Ruud van Nistelrooy and Fergie needs to buy a targetman in January. He missed another one-yard sitter to condemn United to their second defeat of the season.

5. Put the new players through boot camp. Where United's old guard would get fired up from the challenges that were flying in from the likes of Kevin Davies, we saw Patrice Evra, all wrapped up against the cold, complaining bitterly about a strong but fair challenge from the Bolton hardman. Coupled with Anderson and Nani's incessant turf-rolling, this is looking embarrassing.

Friday, November 23, 2007

Happy 3rd Anniversary!

Wow, it's been three years! And every one of those 1,095 days, I thank God for your patience, tolerance and care. I'm looking forward to the rest of my life with you. =]

Thursday, November 22, 2007

Sad, sad England

And so England are out of Euro 2008 before it's even started. What strikes me is how apathetic I am towards their fate, despite being an England fan. Mostly it's due to the fact that don't deserve to be there based on their capitulations in the matches that mattered.

And so I now begin the unenviable task of finding an alternative team next year.

On another note, why not Raddy Avramovic for England manager?

Monday, November 19, 2007

Testimonial match for Amara

Yes, we may have played our last match at Amara. The score was immaterial (7-3 for the record), and there was an excellent spirit all around. A little muddy perhaps, but it was tolerable.

I was not supposed to play at all, as my skin is still dodgy, but I played in goal for a while as the teams were numerically imbalanced. Imagine playing in leather shoes, trousers and white shirt, at the mercy of the other team's misfiring strikers. I got through unscathed after 20 minutes.

I'm glad Ben arranged this match. It was important to end the football this year on a good note. A note too for Matthew, who put aside his feelings to join us. He kept dedicating his goals to Samuel by pointing to the sky, till I reminded him that Samuel was still alive, though not kicking.

When we move to Park Mall, it remains to be seen where we can play. Perhaps Fort Canning? I anticipate picking up loose balls won't be fun.

Saturday, November 17, 2007

Lady in the Water

Flixster plot: A modest building manager named Cleveland Heep rescues a mysterious young woman from danger and discovers she is actually a narf, a character from a bedtime story who is trying to make the treacherous journey from our world back to hers. Cleveland and his fellow tenants start to realize that they are also characters in this bedtime story. As Cleveland falls deeper and deeper in love with the woman, he works together with the tenants to protect his new fragile friend from the deadly creatures that reside in this fable and are determined to prevent her from returning home.

My take: Overly convoluted and incredible.

Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Erik Mongrain - Lap tapping

Ze Neu English

The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.
As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5-year phase-in plan that would become known as 'Euro-English'.
In the first year, 's' will replace the soft 'c'. Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard 'c' will be dropped in favour of 'k'. This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter. There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome 'ph' will be replaced with 'f'. This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.
In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.
Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent 'e' in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.
By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing 'th' with 'z' and 'w' with 'v'.
During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary 'o' kan be dropd from vords kontaining 'ou' and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas!